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Roger looks after his wife full time, as she has osteoarthritis and fibromyalgia, and she needs constant care.
I get two hours to myself each day when the carer we pay for comes in to look after her. I find this time precious, as it means I can do things for myself such as the gardening, going shopping or seeing friends. Most of the time though, I use it to listen to music so I can relax, as looking after my wife full time is hard work.
I go with her to all her doctor’s appointments, and act as her advocate to make sure she is getting the proper care that she needs. We are not entitled to any help from social services other than the basics which everyone can get, as we spent our working lives saving for our retirement. These savings, which were supposed to be for holidays and fun things in our retirement, are now paying for respite care and other things related to my wife’s arthritis, such as adapting our home with special aids so she can get around more easily.
I love my wife, but have found that caring in this capacity has completely changed our relationship.
